Monday, September 19, 2011

The Worst Movies Ever Blogfest!!

Captain Ninja Alex's army is out in full force today, my friends!!  He's hosting The Worst Movies Ever blogfest today ~ and if you want to peruse some other sure-to-be awful movie posts - please click HERE.


As for me ~ I have a feeling some of you are going to look at my list and go, "What the???  Is she crazy???  That movie is a CLASSIC!  Classic, I tell you!!!"  Or, perhaps, you'll think I've hit the nail on its crap-tastic head.  I have friends who have LOVED a few of the movies I'm going to list here... so, clearly - it's all totally subjective.

#1 - Dance Flick:


Oh, those Wayans brothers...  I could probably fill my list with films that the Wayans have had a hand in...I'm not a huge fan of the Scary Movie franchise, either.  Any movie that has to resort to gratuitous gross-outs for a laugh, sexual or otherwise, just ain't my thang.  Plus, this particular movie was NOT FUNNY!  Or interesting, or ANYTHING.  I'll just come right out and say it ~ It sucked.

#2 - Hot Tub Time Machine:


I soooo wanted to like this one.  I mean, c'mon.  Flash back to the '80's?  John Cusack?  Alas, no.  Another pet-peeve of mine...when the F-bomb dominates the overall dialogue in the movie?  I'm thinking there was probably a problem with the script to begin with.  Just sayin'... :)

#3 - Step Brothers:

Will Ferrell is a hit and miss for me, most of the time.  On the one hand, I LOVE him in Elf.  On the other hand, this movie was TERRIBLE!  The premise...it sort of had potential.  Sort of.  The execution?  Gross.  Not funny.  At. All.

#4 - Natural Born Killers:


This is one of the few shows I can remember, where I actually wanted to leave the theater in the middle of the movie.  I haven't watched it since that first time, and granted...it's been 17 years ago...(and wow, just realized Quentin Tarantino wrote this...explains a lot!) but I think it was the blatant, conscience-free violence in this that really turned me off.  I'm almost scared to admit it, I know there are a lot of Tarantino fans out there...but, I seem to have a similar reaction to most of his shows.  So twisted.  So violent.  Although, strangely enough, I really liked the Kill Bills...  go figure.

#5 - Showgirls:

This movie?  I just have to ask...why?

#6 - White Chicks:


Another Wayans movie...this one wasn't the worst EVER, necessarily.  But, they just looked soooo fake in their white chick suits.  Seriously?  Who could believe they were for real?  And something about the eyes looked uber creepy.  Another pet-peeve - movies that propose something to be real that is just far too unbelievable...and yet people believe it anyhow.  I call it the "duh" factor.

#7 - Howard the Duck:

I waver back and forth on this one.  It's so deliciously campy.  And ridiculous.  The cheese factor is a 10+!!  And yet....it's a fake-looking duck from outer space trying to get it on with Lea Thompson.  Yeah...this one flickers from "worst" to "secret cult-classic love" rather frequently.

#8 - Phantasm:


This one just makes me laugh.  I knew I had to put a "horror" flick on here.  And I use the word "horror" loosely.  I rented this for a birthday party when I was a kid, based on my dad's recommendation.  He told us it was one of the scariest movies he'd ever seen!!  My expectations were high for some creepy, movie fun.  Well...there was fun.  My friends and I still have a running joke about how not-scary this movie was.  *Interestingly enough, though - this movie has a 4 1/2 star rating on Amazon.com.... and I'll admit.  I still avoid mausoleums at night.  Oh, and tall, creepy funeral directors.  OH, and pointy, flying spheres of death.

#9 - Jaws 4: The Revenge:



So, funny story.  When the 1st Jaws movie came to HBO, I BEGGED my parents to watch it.  Today?  I'm lucky if I touch a toe in the ocean.  I'm TERRIFIED of sharks!  But, I love the first movie.  It's a true classic.  Unfortunately - I can't say the same for the sequels.  #4 had to be the worst.  I mean...seriously?  Was it the 1st shark's second-cousin's fraternal twin's brother on his mother's side that was coming after Mrs. Brody this time??  Too much.  Oh, and Mario survives that kind of attack?  Lame.

#10 - Gigli:

Ha!  Just kidding.  I know some "lists" out there report this to be the worst movie in creation.  I've actually never seen it.  My real # 10 is:

I don't know - I'm having a hard time with this one.  I keep coming back to funny-man shows that just aren't that funny.  Steve Carell doesn't always do it for me.  Jim Carrey can be annoying.  I wasn't initially a fan of Adam Sandler's...(although, I quite love him now!!)  Pauly Shore.  Remember him?  So, here's a few options for the worst:   The 40-year-old Virgin, Bio-Dome, Airheads, Billy Madison, The Cable Guy...  Which one would you choose?

I know I've forced myself through some other horrible feats of film-making, but these are the ones that came to mind.  Tell me, do you agree?  Disagree?  Have anything to add?  (btw - all movie posters copied here from imdb or amazon.com)

Thanks to Alex for hosting a fun blogfest!  Can't wait to see what other BAD movies are out there!!  But, here's hoping the next flick you catch is a GREAT one!!  Happy Monday ~ :)

25 comments:

TerryLynnJohnson said...

wow, i thought I watch a lot of movies but I've only seen ONE on your list! (I did enjoy Elf too!)
And I have to disagree with bells on for Hot Tub Timemachine being on a worst movies list. The movie was hilarious! Hil-ari-ous! Though, I should point out that my man doesn't usually agree with my taste in comedies. he didn't even like Pineapple Express. Come on - the foot scene!

Unknown said...

You know what the sad thing is, I have seen all of those, actually paid good money to see them in the theaters. And you are right, they pretty much all stunk!

Michael Di Gesu said...

Hi, Donea,

Showgirls made my list too. I picked all the Jaws movies and counted them as one.

As for White Chicks, I agree that they weren't too believable, but I thought the film had some good moments.

ELF is THE only movie I liked WIll Farrell in... Burn the rest.

Stephanie said...

LOL! I did like some of those movies.....Howard the Duck was often played on our VCR when I was a kid! LOL! As far as #10....The Cable Guy was pretty bad.

Unknown said...

natural born killers? phantasm?... i guess i saw them at different parts of my life, which makes them another way.
:)
i love bad/worst movies, these lists are tough!
jeremy
twothumbseightfingers.blogspot.com

vic caswell said...

man, you make me feel like a degenerate! i love a good low-brow comedy from time to time. white chicks was hilarious! but those eyes- you are sooooo very right about those eyes! and the spoofs- if you've seen one, you've seen them all. :)
my favorite was... vampires suck? or something like that which was a spoof primarily of twilight.

Budd said...

hmm, don't know how old you are but Natural Born Killers was written for my "raised on violence" generation. Growing up watching Jaws, Freddy, Jason, and endless movies about Vietnam, we thought we were completely desensitized. NBK proved us wrong. That movie was disturbing. Almost as bad as House of 1000 corpses.

Bish Denham said...

Gosh, except for Natural Born Killers (which was just to disturbing, kind of like A Clockwork Orange) and Howard the Duck (can't even remember the plot) I haven't seen any of these movies! I think I'm very glad.

Lydia Kang said...

NBK just scared the heck out of me. The others are just awful, but Showgirls is so campy in a bad way it's entertaining. I think it's meant to be watched while under the influence, IMHO.

Meredith said...

I've never seen any of these, except Billy Madison. And that one I love, even though it's AWFUL. Well, I love it because it's so awful, I guess. :)

Ava Z. said...

I can only think of two movies right of the top of my head that I thought were absolutely terrible ....

Semi-Pro with Will Farrell and Black Swan with Natalie Portman.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I couldn't get into Natural Born Killers either. I also wanted to like Hot Tub Time Machine, but it was too crude.
Thanks for participating in the blogfest!

Golden Eagle said...

I've never seen any of these movies. :P

Paul Joseph said...

I did like Step Brothers, but that could be a result of my generation/age. Not sure. Passed on Hot Tub Time Machine - the previews didn't appeal to me, and I guess that was a good thing!

Donna K. Weaver said...

As I've looked through blogs doing this blogfest, I'm reminded of how many turkey films are made each year. It's mind boggling.

Jeff Beesler said...

I will never put myself through the torment of watching Gigli. Nuh uh. No how. No way.

baygirl32 said...

White Chicks is on my list too, still haven't forgiven Husband for making me watch that one

KM Nalle said...

Wow, I hated all of these movies. And, for some reason I'm inexplicably drawn to watch Showgirls if it's on TV. Maybe it's kind of like watching a car wreck...

Jennie Bailey said...

My mom went to see Hot Tub Time Machine with a bunch of the old ladies (think 80 year olds) in her quilting club because one of their daughter's recommended it. A bunch of old, prudish women??? They didn't make it more than twenty minutes before they walked out. But it's SO worth it just to be able to have that image in my mind. I'm sure that daughter got an earful!

Amy Beals said...

Fun Blog! So... I hadn't heard of several of the movies. The other ones that I had heard of, I never wanted to see. From your #10 list I would pick Billy Madison. I watched that one and hated it so bad that I can't even remember what it's about... I almost got it confused with Happy Gilmore for a sec! HA!

Small Town Shelly Brown said...

So yours was the first list that I was agreeing with. I say WAS because the very last one got me. I kinda love stupid humor films. You almost had me 100% LOL!

Anonymous said...

We have three movies in common. And I have to admit I loved Step Brothers. Laughed so hard I thought my sides would split.

Unknown said...

Jaws 4 was definitely a sprawling mess. I mean, revenge on a shark? Seriously?! LOL I love your list . There were few I did not think of. I had such a hard time trying to cull my list. :) Airheads and Bio Dome are probably a tie for me. :)

Lisa Potts said...

I had one of the Jaws sequels on my list too. Great minds think alike!

Dave said...

I liked Natural Born Killers...

Dave
Dave Wrote This